Really? Zubaz? Really?

So, apparently Zubaz are back. Wait -- perhaps I should rephrase that: Zubaz are once again being sold. Because, as I've said so many times I'm sure my friends are sick of it, just because something is for sale does not mean it is back.

If you are one of the few humans on the planet lucky enough to be blissfully unaware of this fashion (lack of fashion?) disaster, allow me to educate you -- and then, please let me come live with you in your Zuba free location.

Zubaz are a type of casual pants sent forth from Hell by the Devil himself invented in the late 1980s and popularized in the early 1990s. They are usually made in a zebra print. They taper. They are horrendous. That's really all you need to know.

If you, for some unknown reason, want to learn more about the horror that is Zuba, you can go to the Wikipedia entry that has immortalized this apparell disaster. Because everyone knows that Wikipedia is the word of God and counts as a reliable source, especially for writing scholarly papers and blogs.

Proponents of Zubaz often defend this ghastly garment by proclaiming, "but they're so comfortable!". To which I say: footie pajamas are also comfortable, but you don't see me hanging out at the food court or tailgate party* wearing them. So please, people. If you must own a pair of Zubaz, show some compassion and decency and keep them at home.

Also, Zubaz confirm my theory that things sold at kiosks really aren't things you should be purchasing.

*These seem to be places where fans of Zubaz tend to congregate (based on my scientific research).

On Jeggings

In the introductory post, we exposed you to the latest fashion trend, the jegging.  You might be confused -- what are these jeggings you speak of, and how are they different than skinny jeans?  After a bit of research, I feel that this blog can enlighten you on this subject.


Skinny jeans:  skinny jeans are made of denim, usually with a bit of lycra/spandex for stretch.  They have a tapered leg (ala 1980s) and look great with ballet flats or pumps.  Contrary to popular belief, one does not need to be pencil thin to wear skinny jeans, although a certain body shape does lend itself to the skinny jean.


Jeggings:  Now here's where it starts to get confusing.  Jeggings are also made of denim, may or may not have a closure (zipper and bar closure or button), and tight fit and a tapered leg.  The key differences are the lycra/spandex content (5-7% for jeggings instead of 1-3% for skinny jeans) and the waist is typically a little higher on jeggings.   Becasue of the higher lycra content, jeggings typically have a tighter fit, but that shouldn't scare anyone off.  More lycra also means more comfort.  So, think about jeggings if you want a tight fit but aren't willing to give up comfort.  But, like any fashion craze, there are some ways that it can go horribly, horribly wrong.  Such as:

The Stone-washed Jegging

I beg of everyone, please do not wear the stone-washed jegging.  I lived through the 80s.  This look isn't good on anyone.

 

Introduction to the Trendy Tenders

Tonight's guest blogger is Mikal:

In the beginning, there were ballet flats. And then, God created jeggings.

There was much rejoicing among the people, as these jeggings fulfilled a much needed niche in fashion -- slim pants that have the look of skinny jeans without the bulk of a great deal of denim seaming.

The  choice of blouses with jeggings must be seriously considered. Typically, blouses that fall at the thigh are the most flattering however, it must be considered that for some body types, the choice of blouse makes no difference and jeggings should simply be avoided.

Men should not wear jeggings. See image for proof.